DUSTRIDGE, NM – 52 year old Bennie Denston is still sorting through the fog of the last week as he adjusts to the 7-inch coronary bypass scar on his chest. The events prior to his recent MI are as hazy as the grease stain on the XXL T-shirt he was wearing that fateful day. He remembers the drive to Buggle Burgers restaurant for lunch – a drive that he’s made every day for nearly 30 years. He remembers the way that the smell of bacon and the sound of the sizzle from the deep fryer made him feel alive. And he remembers the way that the 3 patties looked, stacked into a 1-pound tower of meaty joy on a buttered sesame seed bun, right before he took that last bite.
“It’s weird…I’ve been eating that same burger every day since college, so it doesn’t seem like the burger had anything to do with my heart attack. …Just one of those freak things, I guess,” he said in an interview from his ICU room at St. Apollonia Hospital in nearby Alamogordo.
In fact, Denston credits his life to that cheeseburger. He says if not for his daily trip to Buggle Burgers and the quick thinking of part-time cashier, Caleb Kerckewski, no one would have been around to shock his heart or to call 911.
“If it weren’t for Buggle Burger, I wouldn’t be here today,” he said.
As he prepares for the road to recovery, he was asked what he plans to do once he makes it out of the hospital. It didn’t take him long to respond.
“I’m headed out to get a cheeseburger,” Denston smiled. In honor of his recovery and loyalty, the local Buggle Burger has changed the menu. Starting next monday, customers will not be able to order a “Triple Bacon Burger with Cheese;” instead they will have to ask the cheerful Buggle Burger cashier for a “Triple Denston with cheese.”
DISCLAIMER: All stories, medical reports, news entries, and commentary are fictitious, created in the interest of humor. They are the ripe and sometimes rotten fruit borne from the fecund imagination of the Daily Medical Examiner creative staff and any actual relationship to events present or historical should be considered coincidental. The DME uses invented names for people, businesses, and institutions in its stories, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is coincidental.